In this post,I reflect on the six-year anniversary of ending a 14-year relationship. It’s a story of letting go, healing, and the powerful journey of rediscovering myself. Through the pain came growth, self-love, and the realization that sometimes, moving on is the best decision you can make.
Though he was my first love, he wouldn’t be my last!! That hit. I’ve been single for about 3 years after a 4 year relationship & resonate with this so much. We were crippling each other & since, I feel so alive & free. I’m grateful I left.
I agree it is indeed a beautiful journey. However, it can be hard to see it sometimes when your heart is aching. Thank you for spending time with my words ❤️
Currently going through the growing pains of this right now. I said I needed a break at first but after reuniting there’s that same eerily feeling that I just don’t belong here anymore. And it’s hurts deeply especially when you have so much love a person. But I can’t keep fighting with myself. The only real reason I’m holding is fear. Love wants me to let go.
I know exactly what it feels like to be in that space. After I decided to leave, it took me a year before I finally had the courage to leave my relationship. Not to mention the countless times I left and returned over the fourteen years we were together. So many people questioned why I stayed so long, but I had to muster up the courage. I was afraid that he was my last chance at love. If I left that, I wouldn't find anyone to love me again. But in going, I found myself again, which has been the best gift.
Six months into walking away from a 6.5 year relationship and I still struggle to grasp that he’s not “the one” I hope to be as happy as you are some day.
really fitting that this came up on my feed as i just recently had to cut the chord with someone i love deeply—hardest thing i’ve ever done in my life. but your words are so grounding and affirming. thank you 🤎
Wow this gives me hope and brings in a sense of excitement for the unknown for me. I just got out of a 7 year relationship with my ex, we have three children together and I’ve been single for 8 months now. It’s hard for me to imagine my future without him because I wanted things to work so badly but I’ve had to accept that we are both on two different paths and our values, goals, and visions don’t align with one another anymore. This is inspiring. Thank you for sharing a vulnerable piece of your journey with us🤎
I feel so much for you Tanisha. Ending a relationship where children are involved can't be easy, it demonstrates incredible strength. Sending you love on your healing journey.
This popped up in my feed. And wow! How powerful! “I accepted his is my first love and not my last love.” I also enjoyed the lessons you learned along the way. Very timely for me.
Beautifully written Moken. Yes many of us stay loyal to patterns that no longer serve us. I for one as a "recovering co-dependent" can relate totally to this article. Thank you so much and all the best
"I found not just peace but power in the lessons—lessons that taught me my worth doesn’t depend on someone else’s love." One day, I will learn this lesson. Your story encourages me so much and your writing is so beautiful, thank you for sharing. 😍🤗
I love this! The part that I had to come to terms with was definitely having this person etched in memories. I ended the longest relationship I’d ever had and normally when I leave I know I’ll be able to forget some of the time we spent. But I had to realize that I can’t just forget 3.5 entire years I spent with someone and 2 years living together. It makes me want to make my own memories alone more because being tied to a toxic person for so long made me forget who I am uninterrupted by chaos.
I have learned to accept that part of my life. I couldn't even remember any happiness during that time for a long time, but as I healed, I had a more balanced perspective. I think making your own memories is a great idea.
“Sometimes, we allow fear of the unknown to keep us in situations that no longer serve us.” <— the crux of it. Thank you for sharing
This is the bar!
I could feel your ache from so long ago while reading this. This part stuck out: I accepted that though he was my first love, he wouldn’t be my last.
There’s so much power in moving on to allow what’s meant for you a place to land.
Thank you for sharing something so vulnerable. I can relate as I stayed in relationship too long fearing nothing better would ever reach me.
I’m glad I was wrong.
Thank you so much for reading Rachel and leaving such a thoughtful comment. I'm glad you were able to find the love you deserve ♥️
Though he was my first love, he wouldn’t be my last!! That hit. I’ve been single for about 3 years after a 4 year relationship & resonate with this so much. We were crippling each other & since, I feel so alive & free. I’m grateful I left.
I'm so happy to hear that! Sometimes it can be so hard to leave a relationship with someone we've outgrown. I can tell you that it only gets better.
This is beautiful such an expression of being a human and going through all the hard things to come back to ourselves.
I'm so glad you enjoyed it Alicia ♥️
both heartbreaking and beautiful. thank you for sharing it with us.
Thank you so much for reading ♥️
There was so much passion in this! Whew!
Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment. So much appreciated!
I could feel the power in your writing of letting go, the freedom of letting go! I'm in this stage of life and its a beautiful journey.
I agree it is indeed a beautiful journey. However, it can be hard to see it sometimes when your heart is aching. Thank you for spending time with my words ❤️
Currently going through the growing pains of this right now. I said I needed a break at first but after reuniting there’s that same eerily feeling that I just don’t belong here anymore. And it’s hurts deeply especially when you have so much love a person. But I can’t keep fighting with myself. The only real reason I’m holding is fear. Love wants me to let go.
I know exactly what it feels like to be in that space. After I decided to leave, it took me a year before I finally had the courage to leave my relationship. Not to mention the countless times I left and returned over the fourteen years we were together. So many people questioned why I stayed so long, but I had to muster up the courage. I was afraid that he was my last chance at love. If I left that, I wouldn't find anyone to love me again. But in going, I found myself again, which has been the best gift.
You can do this.
Six months into walking away from a 6.5 year relationship and I still struggle to grasp that he’s not “the one” I hope to be as happy as you are some day.
really fitting that this came up on my feed as i just recently had to cut the chord with someone i love deeply—hardest thing i’ve ever done in my life. but your words are so grounding and affirming. thank you 🤎
I am so happy my words could play a small part in your healing ♥️
Wow this gives me hope and brings in a sense of excitement for the unknown for me. I just got out of a 7 year relationship with my ex, we have three children together and I’ve been single for 8 months now. It’s hard for me to imagine my future without him because I wanted things to work so badly but I’ve had to accept that we are both on two different paths and our values, goals, and visions don’t align with one another anymore. This is inspiring. Thank you for sharing a vulnerable piece of your journey with us🤎
I feel so much for you Tanisha. Ending a relationship where children are involved can't be easy, it demonstrates incredible strength. Sending you love on your healing journey.
This popped up in my feed. And wow! How powerful! “I accepted his is my first love and not my last love.” I also enjoyed the lessons you learned along the way. Very timely for me.
Beautifully written Moken. Yes many of us stay loyal to patterns that no longer serve us. I for one as a "recovering co-dependent" can relate totally to this article. Thank you so much and all the best
"I found not just peace but power in the lessons—lessons that taught me my worth doesn’t depend on someone else’s love." One day, I will learn this lesson. Your story encourages me so much and your writing is so beautiful, thank you for sharing. 😍🤗
I love this! The part that I had to come to terms with was definitely having this person etched in memories. I ended the longest relationship I’d ever had and normally when I leave I know I’ll be able to forget some of the time we spent. But I had to realize that I can’t just forget 3.5 entire years I spent with someone and 2 years living together. It makes me want to make my own memories alone more because being tied to a toxic person for so long made me forget who I am uninterrupted by chaos.
I have learned to accept that part of my life. I couldn't even remember any happiness during that time for a long time, but as I healed, I had a more balanced perspective. I think making your own memories is a great idea.
It took me some time to get to my baseline again.
I certainly stayed in my first job for too long. I learned to be more self aware and to have better boundaries with my time and my self worth.